Tuesday, February 14, 2012

A Silly Love Song

I am a music lover. I am not a musician. I am not a singer. I am just a woman who appreciates "good" music. "Good" being defined solely by me. My sons were raised in a house filled with "good" music. I have proudly raised music lovers. (Well, except for one. Boy 3, could careless if there is a radio, CD player, Ipod, jukebox or an eight-track cassette player, for that matter, in his life.) For the first decade of their lives, the Boys listened to what I listened to. After that, they began to develop their own likes and taste in music. Ok, in all fairness, maybe they developed it prior to the age of 10 and I just forced them to suppress it because I refused to listen to anything other than what I deemed "good". That should only cost them one session of therapy when they become adults and complain about their controlling mother. That's not so bad. 

Nevertheless, today is Valentine's Day. "What your favorite love song?"  I decided to do an extremely unscientific empirical analysis of my Boys based on their choice of song. Does their favorite love song correlate to their personality? If in fact, Marianne Williamson is correct when she wrote,  "Love is the essential reality and our purpose on earth. To be consciously aware of it, to experience love in ourselves and others, is the meaning of life" then surely I should be able to extrapolate some analysis about who my sons are based on their choice of love songs. I made it very clear that this had no scientific merit, didn't I? Moving forward, let's see how this unfolds. 

Boy 1

Oh, Boy 1, "What your favorite love song?" I just sent him a text message. He is away at school. Insert Jeopardy music. He replied, "What?"  I don't know that song. Did he just reply to my question with a question? Major pet peeve, but I digress.  Let's try again. "Can you just answer the question?" Insert Jeopardy music. "Cupid. Why?" Ha! I could have guessed that one and I don't have to explain anything to a non-income generator, so I won't be responding to his "Why?"  

Cupid by 112

Cupid. A very straight forward, no frills, non complicated love song. It's well put together and the type of song that is easy on listen to. I enjoy it in my ears. It has a certain appeal. When I hear it, I sway gently, I sing along gently and I'm happy to have had the listening experience.   It's not complex or overbearingly intense. It's simply pleasing. It makes you happy. It's the type of song that is hard not to like.  Yep, just like Boy 1. So far I am an empirical genius!! 

Boy 2.

"What your favorite love song?" 
"You know that answer to that question." As he walks away looking like the Black teenaged version of Lurch from the Addam's Family. 

Boy 2, every morning before school.

Well, he is right. I do know that answer to the question. The WHOLE house knows the answer to this question. See, Boy 2 is the music lover and singer in the family. He has been obsessed with this song since forever. Literally, his forever. The song is older that he is and I've never known him not to sing it. 

Kiss From A Rose by Seal

Ok, what's the point of this study again? Oh, yes, to see if my children's favorite love song reflects who they are. (For all of you who actually know Boy 2, all the Aunties and Uncles out there, you can stop laughing now for the obvious reason.)

Ok, make no mistake, this is a beautiful song. It is masterfully arranged and sung to perfection. This is a "stop what you're doing and turn up the volume" type of song. It is impossible not to get caught in it's rapture. It is captivating. It's a two time Grammy winner. This is no obscure B-side song. This is legitimately a power house of a song. However, what the hell is Seal talking about? A tower. Snow. Kissing flowers with thorns. Addiction. Power. Pleasure. Pain. And what the heck does "on the grey" mean? No, I'm not going to google it. In general, I guess, I get it. I mean, it is a song about love, right? Surely there has to be a simpler way of stating it. What's the need to be so complex? Oh $&%*! This really IS about my son!! That's totally him. I am LOVING this experiment. 

Boy 3.

Oh boy...I already know how this is going to turn out. 

"Boy, what's your favorite love song?"
"Helllllllo! What's your favorite love song?"
"I don't like music like that."
"Seriously? Can you just answer the question?"
"Stevie Wonder. The dolphin song."
(And just so you know, his eyes were closed during this entire conversation.)

So, for all you Stevie Wonder fan's out there, you will immediate note that Stevie never recorded anything called "The Dolphin Song." Because he belongs to me, I happen to speak Boy 3. What my child is referring to is a particular lyric. The song that my child is refer to is titled As

As by Stevie Wonder

"I'll be loving you always...until dolphins fly and parrots live at sea" If you need the reference.

 If we have ever met, you know that I am a Stevie Wonder fanatic. Given that Boy 3 could care less about music, I will argue that this may be the only song that he needs to have in his life anyway! Pure genius. An incredible piece of brilliance with powerful lyrics about unconditional, everlasting love. It speaks of individual love, spiritual love and the love for all humanity. It is a celebration of love, as well as a demand for us to spread love. It's a get up and move your ass love song. As is about loyalty. As is about eternity, a love that continues beyond our time on earth. As is a cornucopia of intensity, power, tenderness and sincerity. Hot Damn! I done did it again! That is Boy 3. He, too, is a cornucopia  of intensity, power, tenderness and sincerity.

Caveat: Boy 3 would have given the same answer if I asked him "What's your favorite pre-football game hype song?" He really doesn't listen to music and this really is the ONLY song he likes. 

Boy 4.

"Hey, Little Bit, what's your favorite love song?"

And this is where my entire experiment blew up in my face.  I refuse to offer an analysis. I am walking away from the data in shame. I am an absolute failure as an empirical scientist and I dare say, even as a parent. I will not skew the data. I will present my findings. However, please note that I am deeply troubled and I questioning where did I go wrong. I asked Boy 4, my sweet, youngest child, what was his favorite love song and with a big, wide grin and energy at Level 10, this is how he responded.

Gold Digger  by Kanye West and Jamie Fox. 


  1. I love this! LMAO...Gold Digger is my jam tho.

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  3. Thank you, 1969. Happy Valentine's Day!